virtual garbage

Utterly Pointless

2008-07-14T22:08:00.004+01:00

So after three months I find myself with time (and enthusiasm) enough to spare to update this blog thing.
It started waaay back in January 2007 with good intentions but soon became apparent that I rarely had anything of interest to say and when I did I was usually too busy to say it. Ah well, that's life I guess.

I am currently sitting under the awning of a borrowed caravan on the South Coast very close to Dawlish. God(s) bless free holiday accommodation! The weather is acceptable (its dry and warm but very dull) and having been to these parts before there is little of interest that we haven't seen before but I really don't care. The sheer joy of not having to answer a phone, not having to work the weekend on yet another "out of hours" job, not having to answer irritating email and not having to be in four places at once is just fantastic.
Around 16 months ago I bought a paperback book, nothing special just something to get me to sleep at night. I started it and read a few chapters and sort of lost touch with it. Today I read another chapter for the first time in ....... actually I have no idea but its been a looong time.
Tomorrow we have decided to visit The Eden Project near St. Austell, something I have wanted to do for quite a while but never really had the opportunity. It is so long since I last enjoyed myself that I have forgotten how to do it!

Of course being busy and for the larger part living out of a suitcase has other downsides too. My diet is dire and my exercise regime is non existent. The excuse for both is lame as there should be no compromise when it comes to your health, but I find that I have put a lot of weight on of late. We are talking stones here as opposed to pounds.
A long time ago my hair colour was best described as fair. Over the years it began to go a little grey around the sides. Over the last few months it has gone from this to the wrong side of "salt and pepper" and is now even going white in places. Scary stuff as I still feel I am too young to have grey hair, hell I'm not even 40 yet! Still, I mustn't grumble as I am the only member of my family left that still has a full head. Everyone else is either receding rapidly or is "as bald as a coot!"

Bah! Enough of the moaning doom and gloom stuff anyway.
Despite being a busy little bee (and lets be honest, I suspect I am no busier than the next person, I just happen to be lazier!) the world in general seems to be a great place to be just at the moment. The summer (such as it is) is here, the nights are light, I have a great job that I enjoy and the family are doing fine. What more could you ask for?

Its about this time of year that the summer "tranny drought" seems to manifest itself. You know, when we all feel less inclined to dress and nothing tranny seems to happen. Well this year it seemed to hit me somewhat early. I haven't had the urge to dress or, indeed even read my favourite T* websites for some months now. It is kind of strange. If I were saying this about any of my hobbies, even the lifelong ones, I would probably say that I had outgrown them and moved on. Of course we all know that when it comes to trannying this is highly unlikely so what is the cause? Not that it worries me adversely, but I'm just sort of, intrigued is all.
Answers on a postcard please....

Anyhoo. Enough of this rubbish, I'm off to bed. I have a busy day of doing nothing ahead of me tomorrow and I want to be fresh for it!

For those of you that are still reading this, thanks for taking the time and sorry it didn't have a "thriller" ending!

Take care of you!
Right now I am listening to: The blissful sound of silence!

Holophonic Sound

2008-03-28T21:00:00.002+01:00

So, I stumbled across this while trawling the net and I think it is really quite fantastic. Using two microphones, placed where each of your ears would be, a recording is made. If you close your eyes its almost like being in the room where it's taking place, though it doesn't really work properly unless you are using earphones.

So why not plug in your earphones and pop along and get yourself a virtual haircut

Right now I am listening to: A holophonic recording!

Trans American Man Pregnant

2008-03-28T02:26:00.002+01:00

So, most of you will probably have already come across this I'm sure. And please keep in mind it is reported in The Sun!

Trans American Man Pregnant

Right now I am listening to: Some drivel on TV

The Colour Of Magic

2008-03-09T22:19:00.005+01:00

So. I'm probably a little late on the bandwagon with this one.

What is The Colour Of Magic? If you are a Terry Pratchett fan it's not to be missed. If you aren't a Terry Pratchett fan, it's not to be missed. So to sum up, it's not to be missed.

The film premieres on Sky One this Easter.

Based on the first in a series of books by the fabulous Terry Pratchett about life on the Discworld, a parallel existence within the Multiverse. A planet that travels through space on the back of four elephants which in turn ride on the back of (an even more) giant turtle named Great A' Tuin.
Featuring Rincewind the wizard (well, sort of wizard), Twoflower the tourist, the wizards of the Unseen University and a cast of thousands in the city of Ankh Morpork.
It makes no sense does it? I recommend reading the novel

So what is the colour of magic? Octarine.

Right now I am listening to: On Days Like These - Matt Munroe

SatNav

2008-03-02T20:34:00.003+01:00

So. I was working in Croydon earlier in the week. I have found it to be a real pain to drive around and very easy to get lost, but maybe that is just me being "directionally challenged."
I finished the job I was at and jumped into the car to make my way back home to Nottinghamshire, but of course I had no clue in which direction to go, so I pulled out the trusty SatNav and prodded the "take me home" button. It promptly announced that the route involved toll roads and did I want to avoid them. Hmm, thinks I suspiciously, not aware of any toll roads in these parts. Anyway I quickly told it to avoid the toll roads as I am a tightwad. Actually I suspect there may be both Scottish and Yorkshire roots in my heritage, but that's another story. I set off and the phone promptly rings. It's the office and I get involved in a technical discussion about another project which goes on for over an hour. All the time I am blindly following the SatNav, not really concentrating on where I am going. Naughty I know, but sometimes needs must.
I suddenly "wake up" and realise that I am on Battersea Bridge! What the ****!!! Before I know it I go over a red circle in the road with a letter C in it. Bugger! That means I now have to pay the congestion charge. As I cruise along the Kings Road I wonder to myself which part of "avoid the toll roads" does the SatNav not understand! By now it is around 5.15pm, peak rush time and I am in the middle of London. I hate driving in London at the best of times and usually refuse to do it, but it's too late now.
Anyway, long story short, I managed to get through and it actually worked to my advantage as there was a huge snarl up on the M25. Result!
Funny how things work out.

Have a great week everyone.

Right now I am listening to: Scooby Snacks - Fun Loving Criminals

Google Analytics

2008-02-17T11:43:00.003+01:00

So, being a sad bunny and always being one for a bandwagon I signed up for Google Analytics a few months ago. Never did anything constructive with it though and it has been gathering dust ever since.
Today I logged in to have a look around and its really quite entertaining. First thing I notice is referrals. Almost 91% of traffic is referred from other sites, which I guess is understandable. Top referrers are Lynn, Rachel and Penny. Thanks ladies! 5% comes from direct traffic. This means someone has this drivel on their bookmarks list! OMG! Lastly 4% of traffic comes from search engines, again understandable. However the search terms that people used to get here are quite interesting. Top entries include "DVD recorder squeaks", (?) "what is meant by sorting garbage" and my personal favourite "garbage discrimination". Garbage discrimination???? Is this political correctness gone mad?

The surprising thing is that despite the fact that I haven't posted anything up for a few months, there has still been a steady stream of traffic coming by, which is nice, if not entirely understandable.

Anyhoo, a big thankyou to everyone that has/does visit. Its nice its nice to know I'm not all alone!!

Right now I am Listening to: Wear You To The Ball - UB40

Mind The Cobwebs

2008-02-15T15:26:00.002+01:00

So. Its been a while then. Standard excuses about being busy, being just plain lazy and being a miserable sod apply. But excuses aside all is well at Nolan Towers. Thanks to all of you that have taken the time to send messages asking after my welfare and give seasonal greetings (yes its been that long. Exactly 3 months to the day actually!), I can only assume you were really bored! :-D

Sure I am busier these days, my new job has really taken off and I seem to spend a lot of time away from home these days. But I am enjoying it immensely and things should settle down a bit in a few months.

These days I really don't seem to have time for all things Tranny though. There was a time when I would check the Internet every day and dress as often as possible. Now I rarely dress and seem to find the Internet a chore. Sure being away from home is a bind and limits Internet access a bit, but I also feel somehow "guilty" surfing tranny sites on a company laptop. Just my own weird psyche I know. You could argue that time alone in hotels is quality time for trannying, but it just somehow doesn't "excite" me any more. I think I may be "growing out" of the whole tranny scene. I know I will always be a tranny, but .............. I don't know, the old spark just isn't there any more. What a depressing sod I am!

So I sit here typing this with a full compliment of body hair and two days beard growth on my face (I have been "working from home" ;-) ). I wonder if this is one of those "pivotal" moments in life, whether I am about to move on, start a new chapter, or whether things will ever be the same again. But its probably just me being a daft old bat.

Anyhoo. Enough of my mindless drivel. I was just saying Hi! and letting you all know that I am still alive!

Right now I am listening to: Atomic - Blondie

Antonio Banderas Wants To Be A Woman.......

2007-11-15T22:48:00.000+01:00

..... apparently!

But only for the day. OK. I'll admit, it's a cheap shot ..........

Clicky here for the story

Right now I am listening to: Suburbia - Pet Shop Boys

Well

2007-11-04T13:02:00.000+01:00

So. It's been a while, again. I am still alive and kicking, just busy, busy, busy these days.

Just after I got back from Tunisia at the beginning of October I started a new job. I interviewed just over a year ago and have been waiting ever since. Now it has finally happened. And boy was it worth the wait.
Traditionally I have only worked for very small companies that employ a dozen or so people. This company is a major multinational with a global presence. Quite a contrast. So far, it has been great. It's pretty much the same job as I was doing before, but now I get paid more and have all the perks to go with it, healthcare, pension schemes, decent company cars etc. Why didn't I do this years ago?
Anyway, long story short, I have been running around like a mad thing trying to keep up with all the new ideas, concepts and general red tape that big companies seem to be so fond of. For the last month I seem to have lived in a string of London hotels and don't seem to have two minutes to do anything other than eat, sleep and work!
Things are beginning to ease up a little now as I settle in and get used to things though and normality should return soon.

While we were away in North Africa, myself and Mrs. Maddie celebrated our 9th wedding anniversary which I have to admit, I am quite proud of. I think that it's quite an achievement in this day and age. Still, in the truest traditions of Sods law, someone had to steal my thunder! LOL Congratulations to Mrs and Mrs Jones who have recently celebrated 10 years of marraige and to Mrs and Mrs Morris who have reached a very special 25 years. Congratulations guys!

So, to sum up, despite being "out of the loop" for several weeks (again!), very little seems to have happened (again!).

Right Now I Am Listening To: Wishing On A Star - Paul Weller

I'm Back, err again!

2007-10-08T22:56:00.000+01:00

So. I was back. And then I cleared off again. But now I'm back again, again. Err, yeah.

So, Tunisia was once again brilliant. Thirty two degrees, absolutely nothing to do but lie on the beach and all the all inclusive beer you can drink. Heaven! I think I may have overdone the sun a tad though as all the skin on my chest appears to have fallen off and it's gone very red and sore!
That's the third time we have been to Tunisia in 3 years now. It's becoming a bit of a habit. Truth is we love it though. It's very temperate at this time of year (we always try to go at the beginning of October to celebrate our wedding anniversary), the people are very friendly and it really is as cheap as chips.

We may need to try something different soon though, before we start to get bored!

This is just a quickie to warn you all that I am indeed back again so that you can all arrange to be doing other things!

Right, I'm off to bed as tomorrow will be busy, what with it being the first day of the rest of my life and all. There may even be a new job lurking about too, but more about that later.

Bye for now.

Right now I am listening to: Bones on TV

I Was Back And Now I'm Off Again!

2007-09-30T00:42:00.000+01:00

So. A brief visit and now I'm off again. Only a short absence this time as I'm off on holiday to (hopefully) sunny Tunisia. Again. We kinda like Tunisia at this time off year as its usually just the right temperature (we don't like it too hot) and its cheap as chips to get there. Sure it is currently the middle of Ramadan, but thats no biggie.

Hopefully by the time I get back, I should have a final decision one way or another as to whether I have my new job. So fingers crossed there then.

Other than that everything is very quiet here at Nolan Towers. It seems normality has, at least temporarily, returned. I'm sure all hell will break loose before much longer, but heck, I'm just enjoying the peace while it lasts.

Right, I'm off. Whatever you are doing this week, have a good one.

Ciao!

Right Now I Am Listening To: One God - Beautiful South

I'm Back! Well, Sort Of.

2007-09-24T11:03:00.000+01:00

So. I've been naughty. Yes I have, just disappeared for 2 months without a word. It wasn't my fault! The dog ate my ........ err ......computer .....

Its been an odd time and if you asked me to explain what has been happening for the last 2 months I would struggle to do it. A sort of mixture of poor health (nothing terminal. "Damn" I hear you cry! :-D), holidays, employment "issues" and redundancy among other things. Its also been one of those times when I just haven't felt like trannying or being sociable. Does that make me sound nasty?

So Maddie hasn't really done anything for ages. Even shopping has lost its thrill. "Him" hasn't done a whole heap either. I think this is in part down to the "closed season" for trannying, AKA the summer. Now I know the weather hasn't been summery in the traditional sense of the word, but we still get the long evenings which are light. It makes a gurl feel very insecure you know. My old "friend" depression has been staying with me too which hasn't helped. I think I'm back on top of it now though.
I have been fighting my (ex) employer who decided he was going to deduct large sums of money from my wages without warning, explanation or even valid reasons. Then he decided he wasn't going to pay me at all for 3 months. Thats currently in the hands of my solicitor and ACAS/employment tribunal.

To try and improve my mood me and L borrowed a caravan (yes I know!) and went off for a few days on the south coast. We have never really been down that way before and I have to say that it was ab fab. We got the best weeks weather of the summer and spent most of the time just kicking back and reading. Bliss.

As of two weeks ago I am officially unemployed as I got made redundant, though I am still waiting for my redundancy pay, surprise surprise! I have another job lined up, the one I have been chasing for a year now, just waiting for the i's to be dotted and the t's to be crossed. Fingers crossed I should be working again in a week or two. So in the mean time, we thought we might take a little holiday. What do you mean we have already been away? Nobody said anything to me about being limited to one holiday a year! :-D This time we are going slightly further afield, to Tunisia (again!). We love it there as it's pretty laid back, very temperate at this time of year (neither of us like it too hot really) and it's cheap as chips to go there. What more can you ask for. It also coincides with our wedding anniversary which is nice. Nine years this year.

That kind of gives you a potted history of the last couple of months at Nolan Towers, so very uninteresting isn't it!

So what have I missed in the respective 'spheres? Thats Tranny and Blog. Anything exciting? It's kind of weird (to me at least), when you have been away from somewhere for a while, you expect things to be radically different when you get back. As often as not that just isn't the case and it's just the same as when you left. Strange thing the human psyche.

Well anyway, I can see you all falling asleep at the back so I'll clear off and let you all have your lives back. Thanks for still being there! Err, hello....... anybody there........?

Right Now I Am listening To: Goodnight Saigon - Billy Joel

Modern Girl

2007-07-14T08:59:00.001+01:00

Remember Sheena Easton? This is a whole new take on the video for her Modern Girl track. I'm not sure it presents a positive image, but there are some funny"one liners".

Right Now I Am Listening To: Modern Girl - Sheena Easton!

Eddie Izzard

2007-07-09T22:11:00.001+01:00

So, this has nothing to do with anything really. But I came across a fan tribute to the great man on youtube and just had to share it.

Right now I am listening to: My Brother Jake - Free

Back Again

2007-07-02T15:38:00.001+01:00

So. The more bored among you may have been wondering where I have been. Actually, you probably haven't, but I'm going to tell you anyway because it gives me something to write about.
Truth is things have not been going all the way I planned of late and its been getting me down. Yes indeed, I've been back to my usual depressive self. The work situation is probably my biggest issue. I have become very disillusioned with the whole thing and at the moment I am seriously considering a change of career. I'm getting too old to be running up and down the country covering starship mileages and staying in a string of budget hotels all the time. The more I think about it, the more I would like a nice little 9 to 5 type job (if such a thing still exists), maybe stacking shelves in B&Q or something like that. Sure it wouldn't be as challenging and the pay would be a lot less than I get now, but there is a lot to be said for knowing that you will be sleeping in your own bed every night and getting to spend more quality time with your family. It's certainly something to think about. Still, it could be worse so I'm not going to whinge too much.
Anyway, I've not been online much recently so I'm trying to catch up with what's new in the trannisphere. It would seem that Sparkle has come and gone again for another year. I really must make a concerted effort to get there some time. I haven't read any of the reports yet, though I am sure there are a myriad of them out there. I hope everyone who got there had a great time.
In the truest traditions of the summer months trannying is currently just not happening, though this has more to do with my current stress levels than the climate. Despite retail therapy on a couple of occasions instigated by "she who must be obeyed" the winnings still remain on hangers in the wardrobe. A wardrobe which is now 65% her, 35% him and bursting at the seams! New (read: bigger!) bedroom furniture is now approaching the top of the "must have" list.
Anyhoo. Just thought I'd say Hi! and let you all know that I am still out there! Right. I'm off down to the council office as I hear they need a road sweeper.......

Right now I am listening to: A head full of worries swirling round and round.

Tranny Footprint

2007-06-11T13:29:00.001+01:00

So, most of you have probably already seen this, but I think its quite fabulous so I'm going to post it anyway!

It would seem Becky has created yet another fabulous toy for us to play with. The Tranny Footprint Calculator. Wonderful stuff

My results look something like this

My Tranny Footprint

1728000 COt

(COt = Cubic Ounces of trannieness)

Calculate your tranny footprint at BeckysWeb!

My Tranny Footprint

I emit as much trannieness as:

Eddie Izzard

Calculate your tranny footprint at BeckysWeb!

Right now I am listening to: Breaking us In Two - Joe Jackson

The Transformation

2007-06-06T22:39:00.000+01:00

So, there is a good base to work with from the start, definitely an advantage. But why do I always end up looking like a bloke in a wig and lipstick?!!!!

C'est la vie!

Did She or Didn't She?

2007-06-04T17:28:00.000+01:00

So, the last fortnight (fortnight, never hear anyone saying that nowadays, is it a Midlands thing?) has been full on mental madness. I have spent most of it in various hotels around London. Despite it being a busy time, mostly at work, nothing of real interest has happened. It would seem I have become boring! What do you mean I always was!
While staying in one of Premier Travel Inns finest establishments (yes I know that's a contradiction in terms!) last week I found time to make like Maddie for a while one evening. I had bought all Maddie's stuff with me and began to get ready. As my room was on the first floor I didn't bother to close the curtains, didn't think there was much point. I dressed, did make-up, sat around in the armchair by the window for an hour or two drinking tea and watching utter rubbish on TV. Before I got cleaned up and went to bed I even managed to take a few snapshots, the vast majority of which were, as usual totally naff and unflattering. Never thought any more about it. I did consider venturing out and about but alas, my nerve failed me. Maybe next time. Anyhoo, the following evening as I came into the hotel the girl on reception gave me a wink and one of those "knowing" looks. To tell the truth it spooked me a bit, but anyway, I smiled back said "good evening" and scuttled off upstairs. Surely I was being paranoid? By pure chance later on , I glanced out of the window from where I was sitting to see a huge CCTV security camera right outside the window. How did I miss that? The camera was angled straight along the wall to keep an eye on the main entrance downstairs and this was just about perfect to capture, perhaps, a good view of said armchair in my room! Bugger!
Now the sensible "me" says that the chances of anything being caught on that camera are practically zero. Angle of camera, reflection of the glass in the window etcetera makes it just about impossible, right? But the paranoid "me" says that knowing look from the girl on reception meant only one thing.
Who knows? To be honest it doesn't worry me at all when I think about it. In fact on reflection I hope it gave her a laugh, she certainly seemed cool enough about it.

Right now I am listening to: Hearsay - Alexander O'Neal

So.....

2007-05-20T20:25:00.000+01:00

.... I'm sitting here on a Sunday evening, thinking it's been a while since I posted anything on that blog thing that nobody reads. Better put something up in case anyone happens across it and thinks I've dropped dead or something. Well, it seems to me that I really don't have anything of interest to blog about. Really. I'm at one of those completely uninteresting places where nothing happens and the day to day grind, err, grinds along. The world is still revolving, the sun continues to rise in the morning and set in the evening and I continue to turn up at work every morning. Other than that, well, there is nothing else at the moment.
I consider this to be a good thing. In my usual pessimistic way I conclude that if nothing is happening, then nothing bad is happening. OK, it could be argued that nothing good is happening either, but I can live with that. Nothing to worry about then. That'll do nicely.
Today has seen a change in the weather too. Its cheered up and its amazing what that will do for your mood. Well, my mood anyhoo.
So. A case of nothing to report then. But at least you all know that I'm still alive and kicking. Hello? Is there anyone there..............?

Right now I am listening to: Rock 'N' Roll Suicide - David Bowie

Fluff

2007-05-16T22:48:00.000+01:00

Blatantly stolen from Stephanies blog. Which OS are you?

Which OS are You?

Right now I am listening to: Walk Away - M People

Do Ya Wanna Be A Slug?

2007-05-12T13:39:00.000+01:00

I came across this on Wikipedia. Don't ask me how.
The relevant bit is under "Reproduction", specifically "Apophallation". Makes my eyes water actually.

Right now I am listening to: Somewhere Down The Road - Faith Hill

To Lie Or Not To Lie?

2007-05-07T21:36:00.000+01:00

So, I was reading Lynns blog when I came across a comment made by Rachel which struck a chord with me.
There are very few of my family and close friends who actually know about Maddie. My wife does but my step-daughter doesn't. At least I haven't directly told her. But when I think about things I am really quite sure she does. There are certain comments she has made for example, which suggest she knows more than I give her credit for. By way of example, a few months ago we were talking about stuff and nothing when I jokingly announced that I was going to have my ears pierced and get some diamond stud earrings, in a chav stylee. She replied, half under her breath, "I'm surprised you haven't had them done already". Kind of shocking really as I can only see one way to interpret that remark. Anyone that knows me at all could tell you that I am not really a typical "lad" and I'm definitely not a chav either. I don't think I come across as camp so the obvious conclusions go straight out of the window. Did she say that because she knows my secret, or am I just being uber paranoid? Its not the only scenario where something like that has happened either.
I agree with Rachel's philosophy about the secrecy too, that while I won't directly announce that I am a tranny (although the more I think about it, I really don't know why not), if she were to confront me I certainly wouldn't lie.

There rises another question. The older I get, the less worried I become about being "found out". I think things through and can see fewer reasons to keep this a secret any longer. I think the majority of my close friends and family are sensible enough to understand and deal with the revelation. But then on the other hand, is there anything to actually be gained by coming out? It would undoubtedly make getting out and about a little easier, but that's about the only benefit I can see. And there is of course the risk that someone may not be able to deal with it and I could lose a valued friend or a family member. Ahh the age old tranny dilemma!
Answers on a postcard please!

Right Now I Am Listening To: Echo Beach - Martha & The Muffins

Discrimination

2007-04-29T17:20:00.000+01:00

There are various schools of thought on the word discrimination. There are even more on how it applies to the Transgendered.
While in London a couple of weeks ago I bought a copy of The Big Issue. It does (in my humble opinion) have some good articles on occasion and I like to have a read through it once in a while. I finally found a few minutes to flick through this week and came across an article on page 18 about Transgender Discrimination, some of the statistics in which were a bit of an eye opener. You can view a scan of the article here. Sorry to anyone on dial-up as it is quite big.

Right now I am listening to: Only A Winters Tale - David Essex

Whoooosh!

2007-04-22T18:43:00.000+01:00

So, it seems that things have gone from one extreme to the other. Whoosh indeed. That is the sound of life passing me by! It was only a few weeks ago that I was constantly moaning about having nothing to do. Now I don't seem to have two minutes to myself. Things have taken off in a big way at work and there just aren't enough hours in the day, which has got to be a good thing. The only caveat is that I am getting just a little bit too familiar with Britain's hotels as most of said work is in the far flung corners of the country. This week for example I shall be mostly staying in Fareham. At least I'm earning a living again though, which is nice.
Things seem to be busy, busy, busy on the home front too. After last weeks disaster we are busy cleaning up and decorating. Trouble is, ever y time we get something done, it makes something else look a bit shabby, you know how it is.
It also seems to be so long since I did anything tranny related that I have almost forgotten how to do it. This week I shall have to miss Chams again owing to the fact that I will be 200 miles away and there will be limited opportunity to take Maddie away with me as there will be a couple of colleagues in the same hotel. I'm simply not that brave!!! Not that I am complaining you understand. Maddie will return soon and may even be able to afford some new stuff for her wardrobe at this rate! Every cloud has a silver lining.

Anyhoo, just thought I'd say hello to anyone who may be reading before I disappear for another week. Ha ve a good one y'all.

Right now I am listening to: I Don't Want To Talk About It - Everything But The Girl

Ermm...Its Not Meant To Go Like That

2007-04-16T20:26:00.000+01:00

So, I'm not having the best of weeks. Things began to take a downturn last Thursday and haven't begun to get better yet. Still after today I don't see them getting much worse.
Last Thursday I was planning on visiting Notts Chams. Yes I was scheduled on standby by the on call rota, but this generally isn't a problem. Our systems are pretty reliable and don't usually give any trouble, so I should be able to nip along and nobody would be any the wiser. Unfortunately one of our customers decided they were going to choose Thursday evening to do a power down, so I had to be on site at 11.30. In Telford. Bugger!

The weekend arrived with the news that we (again!) don't have any work on for a couple of days, specifically Monday (today) and Tuesday. And I have developed a nasty case of insomnia. Just don't seem to be able to sleep at all.

So this morning I thought I'd get on with giving the bathroom a bit of a makeover. We have been planning on doing it for a while so I thought I'd make use of the free time and get it started. After twenty minutes the old floor covering was history. An ideal opportunity to repair the squeaky floorboard underneath that's been bugging me for months. It needed to be replaced as it had split and that was causing the squeak, so out came the trusty circular saw to cut away the dead part. You've already guessed where this is going haven't you?! I set the depth to 19mm as the average floorboard is 18 mm thick. Ten seconds after starting the cut we have "Old Faithful" gushing out from beneath the bathroom floor and hitting the ceiling. Bugger! Downstairs at warp 5 to the stopcock to turn off the water reveals that apparently our stopcock doesn't actually work. Double bugger! What now? OK, there is a main stopcock in the street so lets find that. Fortunately it was easily located and I didn't need the extra long key to turn it off either! Phew! Right so Old Faithful has now subsided, but we still have Niagara Falls cascading through the ceiling and down the light fittings in the dining room. Off with the main electric switch then. Which causes the tamper feature on the alarm system to activate. A quick prod at the control panel sorts that out. For about two minutes. Then I notice there is water trickling through the carbon monoxide sensor and the alarm goes ballistic and won't be shut up. Bugger again. Righto, lets call the alarm company then. I can't as I have just turned off the electric supply and our cordless phone system no longer works. So off I go in serach of my mobile to make the call. Just as the Fire Brigade turn up in their own unique style complete with sirens and blue flashing lights. The alarm system has decided that we are in imminent peril and called the control centre. Who I can't call to tell them that it's a false alarm because our phones are down. And they can't call me because our phones are down.

Anyhoo, several hours with a Vax, a bucket and mop and a blow torch sees most of the mess cleaned up and the damaged pipe repaired. The alarm engineer arrived after two hours and shut the alarm up, much to the relief of both me and my neighbours! It looks like the dining room has caught the brunt of it and the ceiling will need replacing as well as totally redecorating. Perhaps not a bad thing as it needed freshening up anyway. The bathroom is drying out nicely. One thing that does spring to mind is how foul wet plasterboard smells, it really is quite nasty.

And first thing tomorrow I'll be calling a plumber to fix that stopcock!

Right now I am listening to: The sound of silence as the peace has returned!

Admirers

2007-04-11T16:59:00.000+01:00

So. Three posts in three days. What is going on here? Don't panic, I haven't actually gone out and got a life. But "stuff" seems to be happening all around.

As I trawl around the tranny parts of the web, I inevitably come across gurls who have encounters with "admirers" or if you prefer "tranny fanciers". Some appreciate the attention, some don't. It's never actually been a problem for me as I have never had such an encounter. Until today. I opened up my inbox this morning to be greeted by a message forwarded from my Flickr account. Written in pigeon English and apparently from an Italian "gentleman" by the name of Simo, who at some length, professes his admiration and attraction of "your simple and fascinating beauty" among other things.
OK, so this guy is one of three things. Certifiably blind, very desperate or on a huge wind up. But that aside, I can't help feeling just a little bit flattered. Not that I am interested in any male attentions as I am very happily married and consider myself heterosexual (or perhaps metrosexual, but thats a whole different post), but the fact that somebody out there in the big blue yonder has actually noticed me, for whatever reason, and told me about it gives me a bit of a buzz. Daft I know, but that's me all over.
I probably won't bother to respond, and that brings another thought to mind. Surely these admirers get knocked back (or ignored) all the time, so why do they actually bother to send these emails in the first place? Perhaps the law of averages, that if they send enough messages out, sooner or later somebody will respond positively. Perhaps they are genuine people looking for love, though I have to admit to being sceptical about this. I really don't know.
Anyhoo, just thought I would share this little episode.
As you were.

Right now I am listening to: Free/One - Lighthouse Family

Just A Quickie

2007-04-10T21:14:00.000+01:00

So, I have been tinkering with the template of this here blog. I have even managed to successfully change a couple of bits and bobs. Wahey! But owing to the fact that I know naff all about coding/ XML etc I am struggling with it. Quite impressed that I didn't break it mind.
Anyhoo. The point of this post, such as there is one, is does anyone know of any half decent "Idiots Guide To Blogger Template Tinkering" type resources on t'interweb? Not managed to find anything suitably idiotproof yet and I quite fancy playing some more. Answers on a postcard to the usual address.
Thanks y'all.

Right now I am listening to: River Road - Crystal Gayle

Back To The Humdrum

2007-04-07T20:15:00.000+01:00

So, this week I have mostly been sampling the delights of Travel Lodge and Farnborough. Its good to be back at work and earning some cash again. Not sure we are completely through the "drought" yet, but at least its a start. And its amazing how a little extra daylight and some nice weather can change your view of the world. Things are looking up.
I have just noticed that it has been almost a fortnight since I last posted any senseless drivel. How time flies when you are enjoying yourself! I shall have to remedy this as I can't have you lot getting away with it that easily! Trouble is, nothing of note seems to be happening these days.

It can now be said that summer (at least as far as I am concerned) is officially here. I have just returned from my first barbecue of the season. Yes indeedy, half cooked sausages and salmonella are here again. Happy days.

Don't you just love technology?
SWMBO and me have had a bit of a windfall this week. We have a family member who has been in poor health recently and we have been lending a hand and generally looking after her a little. Anyhoo, this week she handed us a cheque for a not inconsiderable sum and told us to go and buy ourselves a new television and DVD recorder. We have been hankering after a TV for while as ours is on its last legs. We argued that we couldn't accept the gift as it was far too generous and after a brief arguement we were beaten into submission.
So armed with a fistful of pound notes and a vague idea of what we would like we set out on Saturday morning to brave the hoards of blood sucking sales people pouncing on us at every turn and purchase said electrical goods. We wandered around several electrical retailers and eventually settled on some Sony equipment from a shop on The Wyvern near to Derby. OK so we have the equipment, all thats left is to go home and plug it in right? Wrong. Apparently we need something called an "HDMI" lead to connect the TV and DVD recorder together to get the best quality. So we got one. As I sit here I still cannot believe that I paid £40.00 for a one metre lead! And I cannot believe that I paid another 70 quid for a one metre long scart lead either! FFS! Have I lost touch with reality? Am I being unreasonable? Or is 70 quid for a one metre long cable taking the p**s?
Anywayz, we got said equipment home and set up and we are now working our way through the instruction manuals (which are about the size of War and Peace) to see how they work. Shame we don't have any six year olds in the house to help us out.
I must confess though, it is damned nice!

Right now I am listening to: If You Were Here Tonight - Alexander O'Neal

Yawn!

2007-03-27T17:38:00.000+01:00

So. Hmm. Yeah. Absolutely nothing happening here at all. Don't even know why I am writing this. "Move along please there's nothing to see here." I am possibly the most unintersting person alive at the moment! lol This is bad for blogging, but its actually quite good from my point of view because it means nothing bad is happening! Possibly a slightly pessimistic point of view, but I can live with that for now.
Things have quietened down over the last couple of weeks and I have fallen into a comfort zone. Its working quite well for now. I've even had time to disappear into the garage and hit stuff with large hammers! Haven't done that in ages.
Its usually at times like this that I have more time to reflect and end up getting philosophical. Even that isn't happening right now.
So. All quiet on the western front. With all this free time I've been catching up with the news. One little snippet that I came across was really quite astonishing. Have a look for yourselves and see what you make of it.
Clicky here!
I'm still in two minds as to whether its mildly amusing or absolutely appalling. I guess there is actually not a lot that can be done in that situation.

Hopefully the madness will be restored soon!

Right now I am listening to: Up The Hill Backwards - David Bowie

Slow

2007-03-18T14:24:00.000+01:00

So, I seem to be at a really strange place at the moment. Things are not really going the way I would like them to, but that's life. I have over the last couple of weeks been down in the doldrums and feeling quite low. But now I am not. Now I just don't give a damn any more. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean that I'm ready to do something silly, like jumping off a tall bridge, but neither am I quite jumping for joy either.
Life is just too short to worry. I know this of course, but sometimes it takes a while to remember. It maybe takes another occurrence to put things into perspective, to present a moment of clarity. I'm not sure what it is that has brought me to this state of mind, but I am here. I think the weather outside sums up my mood quite nicely at the moment. I look through the window and can see the brilliant sunshine reflected on the surface of the lake, but I can also see that it is snowing.
So I am for now just coasting along and we'll see what tomorrow brings.

Nothing is really happening in my world right now and I fell like I am marking time. Still, that is all set to change (hopefully) soon as plans begin to come together. The future looks bright, though not necessarily orange.

So British Summer Time begins next week. We gain an extra hours light in the evening. Cool! It does however maybe present a few problems. For example, I have on occasion (OK, so far its only been once!) been known to toddle along along to Notts Chams of an evening and leave my humble domicile dressed to the nines. Well, in girly mode anyway. I only felt confident enough to do this as I was under cover of darkness. Lighter evenings mean no such cover. OK, so its not a major thing I know. I can happily change when I get to the Chams group, but it takes a certain "dimension" away from the experience and one that is a huge confidence booster at that. Ah well. there is always the winter to look forward to!

The unseasonal clemency of the weather seems to have brought forward the traditional "summer trannying drought" too. You know the one, where you just don't feel like getting involved in anything tranny related. It always seems to manifest itself in the summer when its too warm/sunny/light etc. Actually I never did come up with a suitable explanation as to why this happens but it does and on an annual basis. Strange.

Anywho. As you have doubtless worked out by now (those that didn't do the sensible thing and surf off elsewhere after the first sentence) I am rambling. This is a direct result of having very little that could be deemed interesting happen in my world this week. Gluttons for punishment can tune in again soon!

Right now I am listening to: Saturday Love - Alexander O'Neal & Cherrelle

Remember Me?

2007-03-12T10:29:00.000+01:00

So, it's been a while. Sorry about that dear reader. Yes you! The one hiding in the corner pretending not to read this drivel!

Its been a bit of a rollercoaster for me over the last couple of weeks. Sorry for just disappearing.
Where do I start? Well, its all getting silly at work for a kick off. The company apparently has nothing to do. I last worked on 27th February, so nearly two weeks ago. Since then I have been sitting at home unpaid. This has put me in a major depression. Contractually I am not allowed to find temporary work (like that is going to stop me, I have to pay the mortgage somehow) but have you tried getting casual/short term work these days? It's not as easy as you'd think. Still, it can't get any worse right?
The really annoying thing is I actually have another job. Sort of. I interviewed last September and was recently told on an unofficial level that the job is mine. Trouble is the paperwork is currently with the beancounters and those "upstairs" and they have no idea as to when they will return it. It could be tomorrow or it could be in three months time. Nobody knows. Or if they do know, they aren't telling me! I hate bureaucracy and red tape! Still, I guess the day when it happens is getting closer rather than further away. At least I hope so.
Trouble is, all this worry about money and jobs and stuff is doing my mental health no good at all. Ah well, it could be worse I suppose.

Apart from that, I seem to be busier while I'm not working than I ever am while I am working. Strange that. Again the annoying thing is, I have loads of jobs that need to be done around the house, but I am reluctant to do them because I don't wan't to spend any cash. I might need that to pay next months mortgage! There's always something to moan about isn't there!

Maddie has been firmly locked in the wardrobe for weeks now. You know it's strange, I read blogs and forums and websites and for the most part it seems that when people are feeling down or stressed a few hours "dressed" seems to help. For me it seems to be the exact opposite. The only theory I can come up with about this, is that I really haven't reached any significant level of self acceptance when it comes to the whole tranny thing. I know this has always been a problem for me and although I am getting there very slowly I wonder how I can speed things up a bit, so to speak.
I know that the inner tranny is part of me. I know it is inherent and isn't going to go away. Trying to suppress or deny it will only result in my becoming ill, again. I know that there is nothing wrong with it either. I even have the unconditional acceptance of my fabulous wife, so why do I have such a huge problem accepting it myself? It remains a mystery to me.

Ah well. Enough! Once again dear reader you have sat and listened to my rantings, ravings, twaddle and rubbish without complaint. Thankyou! As Mr. Hoskins used to say "it's good to talk" and it certainly helps me to vent all this stuff.

Right now I am listening to: For No One - Rickie Lee Jones

Mellow

2007-02-25T15:26:00.000+01:00

So the hustle bustle of the last couple of weeks has ended. I am back at home sitting in my favourite armchair with a steaming mug of tea and catching up with news on the web. Bliss.
For the first time in months, I actually feel relaxed and have little to worry about. Usually I end up worrying because I have nothing to worry about, sort of expecting it to be the calm before the storm, silly I know, but that's just me. Right now though, I am feeling at one with the world.
As things calm down my view of the world is becoming more clear and positive. Makes a change for me as I usually tend to hold a very negative view of the world at large. I guess its that time of year when spring is upon us and the nights are beginning to draw out. Always helps to make things look better.
So I start to look forward. And even the fact that I really have little to look forward to at the minute fails to dampen my spirits. Only one bright spot on the horizon which I have been eagerly awaiting for around six or seven months now, but its probably not appropriate to mention that just yet so you readers will have to wait a little longer, both of you!

I am once again having thoughts about going along to Sparkle this year. It would be a great buzz for a (mostly) closeted tranny like myself, but I still don't know if I have the nerve. I suppose I should just say "sod it" and book a hotel but there is "something" holding me back. And I have no idea what that "something" is. Anyone else out there planning on going along? Maybe a day trip is in order, though that plan brings a whole pile of logistical problems of its own.

Since you are reading this you are obviously aware I have an online blog. I also have my modest attempt at a website out there. For the larger part the website doesn't really get any interest and gets maybe 3 or 4 hits a day at best. Suddenly last Thursday and Friday the hit rate has gone mad (at least by my modest standards) and I'm now getting between 25 and 35 hits a day. Not a huge amount in the grand scheme of things, but a good deal more than I am used too. First thoughts are paranoid ones. "Oh my Gods, someone I know has put two and two together and worked me out and has advertised said page to everyone I know" sort of stylee. Having had a day or two to reflect, I'm not so sure this is actually the case. But I still don't know why the hit rate has increased. Not that I am complaining you understand. Any ideas? Answers on a postcard please.....

I've just finished watching Top Gear. Anyone a fan? Don't get me wrong, I love the programme and have done since the days of William Woollard and Chris Goffey, but I can't help thinking that in recent weeks they have begun to lose the plot.
To me, Top Gear has always been a motoring programme, but now it seems to be more focused on how bizarre they can make the stunts. Take last week for example. Does launching a Reliant Rialto into space on the back of a home made rocket actually have anything whatever to do with motoring? I think not. And how much did that little escapade actually cost? This week they have decided to have a go at "growing" some petrol. OK, so that could be considered motoring related, but again they have put the emphasis on larking about in bloody big and expensive toys, this time almost half a million quids worth of agricultural tractors. At the licence payers expense. Hamster even managed to destroy Vauxhall's prototype Astra in the process.
Maybe I'm getting old and grumpy, but I liked the old format when they actually drove cars, even if they were rare and exotic supercars most of the time.

Anyway, enough of my moaning. Another new week beckons and it will soon be time for bed.

Right now I am listening to: Shame and Scandal - Madness

Garbage on Garbage

2007-02-23T22:26:00.000+01:00

Boring Boring Boring!
So I completely missed posting last week. I generally like to have a waffle on a Sunday, but it was frantic all week and I didn't get the time.
Since Thursday last week I've been living in various Travelodge and Campanile stylee hotels around the country, I am currently in a Premier Travel Inn in Watford. I had no idea that this would happen at the start of last week, funny how things pan out.

Apart from work and more work its been really quiet with me, the daily humdrum has continued and life is ticking along nicely thank you very much.
I managed to miss the Chams meet on Thursday as I was still in London, shame as I quite fancied having a go at the line dancing that was arranged for this week. But I did have a couple of celebrity encounters while prowling around Leicester Square. Nobody really “A list”, but a talking point none the less. I was just leaving Pret's after a quiet coffee when I bumped (almost quite literally!) into Tony Hadley outside wandering the other way. Five minutes later on the Tube going back to the West End I sat opposite Terry Jones of Monty Python fame. At least I think it was! Quite a thrill for me as I was bought up on a diet of Monty Python and Spandau Ballet.

Highlights of the week have to go to working in The Royal Albert Hall and getting to see what goes on behind the scenes. Its absolutely amazing how much work goes into a show, I had no idea. A quick snapshot of the stage for Madam Butterfly below (the current production which started last night), (apologies for the cr*p photography) which took several weeks to construct and will only be used for a fortnight. Go figure!

The other event of note this week (not really a highlight) was the building next door to the Royal Albert Hall catching fire. A kitchen fire caused the apartment block to go up in flames and half of London's fire brigade were kept busy for the larger part of two days. Fortunately nobody was hurt, but there is going to be one hell of an insurance claim after that!

Since I was only a mile or so away from Kensington, I thought it would be a good opportunity to drop into the MAC store on Kensington Church Street and get some full coverage foundation. I adjusted the route into work slightly and left the tube at High Street Kensington in order to call in on the way. Sod's law does of course state, that if you don't have time to wait the shop will be closed. Bugger! Still, I'm sure I will be back there before I am very much older.

Stop Press!
Thumbing through a copy of London Lite on the tube I came across an interesting little article. It seems that the secret of reducing unwanted hair lies in spearmint. Yes indeed, according to a new study drinking two cups of spearmint tea a day apparently reduces sex hormone levels in the blood and helps reduce excessive body hair. Apparently.
Thats the good news. The bad news is that it is apparently, only effective with genetic women. Sorry gurls. Still, maybe mango tea or perhaps camomile may work for the rest of us. I suppose it has to be worth a try.

Right, thats about as exciting as my week has been, so I'll get off home. Have a good weekend y'all.

Right now I am listening to: Together In Electric Dreams – Giorgio Moroder & Philip Oakey Don't snigger!

Look At Me!

2007-02-06T23:29:00.000+01:00

So its been another manic week. The hours at work seem to be getting longer and there seems to be less and less time for fun. Still, when it is time for fun, you just have to make sure that you make it count! I am way behind schedule. Thats the thing about working, I find it makes a terrible hole in your social calendar.

Notts Chams again this week (actually I think that is technically last week now!) so I managed to go along. I was late, as always. Got back from work very late, the M42 was chocka-block because of the snow. Had a quick bite to eat and got Maddie out of the wardrobe and "transformed". Right, I have a choice of three cars to use to get there. Which one do I choose, bearing in mind that this will be the first time I have left the house and gone anywhere as Maddie and its also very snowy/icy. Choice one a VW Passat. Very understated and blends in well. Choice two a Ford Focus, the epitome of British Suburbia and driven by housewives everywhere. Choice three, a Porsche, very low, very loud, bright red and rear wheel drive. Yep. You guessed it, I took the Porsche!
It was all going quite swimmingly too, until just before I got to the Motorway and the exhaust went south. Bugger! Do I turn around and go home or ignore it? Ignore it of course! I'm pleased to say that I managed to get there and back again without any unwanted attention, though I think I may have woken the neighbours as I pulled onto the drive sounding like a tractor. Still, nobody has said anything. Glad I did decide to carry on too, as I won Lynn's music quiz when I got there and was awarded a bottle of Vino. Thanks Lynn!
Not sure how much I will be able to get out over the next couple of weeks as I will be staying down in London for the duration. A bit of a bind, but needs must. Anyway, you never know as the powers that be change their minds like they change their underwear. In fact in some cases that may even be more frequently than their underwear, but thats a whole different story!

Right now I am listening to: The Way It Is - Bruce Hornsby & The Range

Happy Birthday?

2007-02-04T19:34:00.000+01:00

So it's Sunday again and it's February already. How time flies when you are enjoying yourself.

Its been a quiet old week I'm pleased to say. The pace has slackened and the world doesn't seem so mad, which is good. It also means I have a distinct lack of anything to talk about, which is bad.

I've been thinking again. Scary I know, but bear with me. Your average tranny seems to have two birthdays. "He" has one which is quite easy to work out and "she" has one too which is not so easy to work out. Thing is what qualifies as "her" birth? Is it the first time you got the urge to try on something girly, way back (for most of us) in the mists of time? Is it when you first made a concious realisation that there was another persona hanging about the place, for those that see things that way? Perhaps its the moment when your femme alter-ego was named? Or maybe the first time that "she" ventured out and about?
I think for me its probably the first time that Maddie ventured out. So that would be about a year ago then, when I first visited Notts Chameleons at their, then, home in Arnold. It only seems like 10 minutes ago. Sadly, I only visited a couple of times before life sort of got in the way. Fast forward twelve months and I visited again a couple of weeks ago at their new home in Nuthall, albeit in Bob mode. Looking forward to going along again this week.
It would be quite interesting to hear what others consider the birth of their femme side.

The more observant may have noticed the hyperlink wherever the word "transvestite" or one of its derivatives appear within my idle ramblings. It is of course my half assed attempt at Googlebombing. A while back there was a "campaign" (for want of a better word) to get a certain supplier of products to the T* community off the top of the Google search results. Well, it would seem that said campaign has in fact been successful at last. If you now put the word "transvestite" into Google it brings back the Wikipedia entry as the first result. Cool. Today Wikipedia, tomorrow the world! OK, maybe not a major thing, but I thought it was pretty cool.

Right now I am listening to: Me and You (Against The World) - Joe Jackson

Insert Witty/Enigmatic Title Here

2007-01-28T22:23:00.000+01:00

So it's Sunday again already. Another three days and January will be gone for another year. How time flies. It will soon be Christmas again!

I finally managed to get myself in gear and get along to NotChams this week. Not really a major achievement and I only managed an appearance in Bob mode, but I'm so glad I made it. Almost a year to the day since my last appearance.
The group were as always very welcoming and I managed to do a little catching up which was long overdue. All in all a great evening. I'm looking forward to getting along to the next meet when Lynn has threatened us with a music quiz. I might even shave and dress appropriately next time too!

Well, that was definitely the highlight of the week. In fact, that just about sums up my week if you discount work and sleep! I spent an enjoyable couple of hours with my better half last night surfing various online clothes shops and spending far too much cash, but most of it will probably end up going back anyway.
Its only when I stop to think that I realise just how empty my life seems to be right now. Yet there never seems to be a spare minute. Odd.

Still, I manage to find time to cogitate. And recently I have been cogitating this. What exactly is "normal"? Everyone that belongs to a minority group seems to be considered by the mainstream as not being normal. But where did the definition of normal come from? I believe that the average punter confuses "normal" with "usual" which, to me at least, is something quite different. Usual is just what happens the majority of the time. It's commonplace. It's usual. But is it normal? Does "normal" actually exist? I don't think it does exist any more. Modern culture has now become so diverse that I think normal has been blurred to the extent that it can no ,longer be defined. What is normal to one person is lunacy to someone else. So it could be said that normal changes with each individuals viewpoint. And if that is the case, then it must be considered to be subjective. And if if it is subjective, how can it be defined? Is anyone still reading this? Does anyone care? Have I completely lost the plot? Does this post actually have a point? I guess the point, as far as there is one, is that if "normal" has such a wide scope , why are people so quick to jump on minority groups with a metaphorical big stick and beat the hell out of them? I thought that diversity and varied culture were welcomed these days and were what made the world such a great place to live in. Maybe I was wrong.

Enough of that rubbish anyway. On reading through Lynn's Blog the other night I came across her link to myheritage.com. So I just had to have a go with the face recognition thingy didn't I. Great find Lynn. The results are below, some of them nice, some of them rather scary. I'll let you decide what you think. The piccy may be a tad small so click on it to see a bigger version.

Right. Thats more than enough drivel from me.
Ciao!

Right now I am listening to: Don't Fear The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult

You Mean Its The Weekend Already?

2007-01-21T14:05:00.000+01:00

So it's been one weird week. Despite it being seemingly frantic and passing by at the speed of light, nothing seems to have happened. I feel exhausted, but when I look back at the week gone by, I have no idea why. Strange. Nothing of note has happened, but the day to day "struggle" of living seems to have somehow been more tiring. Maybe I'm getting old.

I have spent an almost obsessive amount of time reading other, predominantly T*, Blogs this week. Each one gives a small insight into the author and they are, on the whole, so well written that its easy to identify with the feelings portrayed. Some are funny, some are sad and some (like this one) are just about the "hum drum" and nothing, but still rivetting (unlike this one). So what is it thats so fascinating about someone elses life? Ever tried to quantify something like that? It's surprisingly difficult. I guess there is the fact that the world through someone elses eyes is often quite different to your own view. People react differently to any given situation, people all have their own ideals and their own goals, they make decisions in different ways using different criteria, it is after all what makes us all unique. But what is so irresistable about a peek inside someone elses thoughts? Why are we all so fascinated? and lets be honest we all are aren't we? I've been trying to come up with an articulate answer all week and its just not happening for me. Of course I could just be spouting cr*p. Sounds more probable to me.

Right now I am listening to: Twin Cinema - New Pornographers

Introspective

2007-01-14T19:24:00.000+01:00

So I am in one of those weird moods. I have achieved precisely zip all weekend. I haven't really been out of the house, save for a trip to the shops and a brief spin in (one of) my car(s) to stop it seizing up. Its a "fun car" and doesn't get used much. All I have to look forward to is another week of working evenings in a job that I don't like much. Things haven't been helped by a visit to Clarissa's Blog either. After reading that I started to question exactly what it is I do with MY life too. I have yet to find an answer. I could quite easily slip into one of my depressive moods. But enough of the dark thinking. In the grand scheme of things it could be a lot worse so I really shouldn't be moaning.

So I find myself asking "how does one go about getting a life?" Not a flippant question, I really mean it. I'm not a great socialite and I have a bit of a confidence problem so how do I start to do "fun" stuff? Again I have no answer. It's such a long time since I last enjoyed myself that I seem to have forgotten how to do it. Answers on a postcard please.

This is beginning to sound like a right old whinge isn't it? That really wasn't the idea when I started typing, its just sort of gone that way. The only thing I seem to have a flair for is depressive thinking!
At least I have managed to find time to get Maddie out of the wardrobe for a while. It's fast becoming a novelty these days. I had some new stuff delivered last week and on Friday I found time to try it on. Sadly most of it had to go back as it didn't fit properly, but that just means I get to order some more stuff instead, right? The only thing that survived is a damson coloured bustier top and to be honest, I have no idea why I ordered it in the first place. Its a bit on the showy side and I really have nowhere to wear it. I guess I shall have to get that life after all and find a party to go to!
Talking of getting a life, I am beginning to wonder whether I am brave enough to put in an appearance at Sparkle this year. I've dreamed of doing it for the last couple of years but always found an excuse that means I can't go. It's partly to do with that confidence problem. Anyone else going?

Hopefully there should be a not too scary pic of Maddie in that damson bustier in this post somewhere, but I'm not sure whether its there or not. It doesn't seem to show up in preview mode, but I can see the necessary code in HTML view. I do so wish I wasn't "technologically challenged." Well I suppose I'll find out one way or the other when I click the "publish" button.

Right now I am listening to: Battle Of The Beanfield - Levellers

Little Shop Of Horrors

2007-01-10T14:09:00.000+01:00

So I've just got back from the dentist. The second time I've had to visit this week. I am £180 poorer and still have to go back again next week. I guess if you average £180 over 12 years (thats how long it is since I last went!) thats not too bad, its just a little steep when you have to pay it all at once.
I am covered in tea as half of my face is numb and I can't feel the cup when I'm drinking. I dare not try to eat as I will probably chew the inside of my mouth away.

Well, I was planning to spend a couple of hours as Maddie this afternoon, but somehow I just don't think thats going to work. Maybe I should have shaved before I went to the dentist! I think I would still struggle with make up anyway with my face in its current state. Never mind, there is always tomorrow.
I was invited along to The Chameleons (a local social/support group) tomorrow by a friend (Hi Lynn!), but I have ended up working the twilight shift and it looks like I will be doing the same for the rest of the month so it looks like thats out too. Thats one of the problems with working in the communications industry, customers never want any interruption to service so a lot of the work is at odd hours. Shame as its about a year since I last visited and I was just in the mood for it as well.

So far this year is not going all the way I had hoped!

Right now I am listening to: Dance With My Father - Luther Vandross

New Beginnings

2007-01-08T00:23:00.000+01:00

A new year, a new Blog and indeed, new beginnings.

I have pondered the idea of writing a Blog for a while now, but honestly thought that my life was boring and nobody would be interested. Several people said I should give it a go, so, here it is.
I really don't know where this is going to go, but we'll see. A collection of random thoughts, a meaningful monologue or a pile of cr*p. Time will tell. My guess is it will disappear before Christmas next.

So I have the Sunday evening blues right now. The usual thoughts of work in the morning, a mad cross country dash in the Monday morning traffic to get to site coupled with the fact that I have managed to crack a tooth on, of all things, a piece of Cadburys Dairy Milk! Who'd have thought it possible. My own fault I guess, as its almost 12 years since I last visited the dentist.
There has also been a distinct lack of Tranny action for the last week. Having stayed in what was possibly Londons worst hotel with a colleague is not conducive to dressing en-femme. The weekend has been taken up with doing stuff that I should have done during the week and all of a sudden its time to go back to work again. C'est la vie!

Right now I am listening to: I Started A Joke - Faith No More